Healing from an Intimacy Disorder

Intimacy disorders include love addiction, sexual compulsion, and attachment disorders. When attachment wounds occur during the lifespan a person can develop a fear of emotional or physical connection to another person. This interferes with developing a healthy connection in intimate relationships. There are many causes including verbal, physical or sexual abuse, emotional neglect, substance addiction or sexual addiction in the home during childhood. Growing up in a dysfunctional family system can foster attachment wounds later on in adulthood. 

Some common symptoms of intimacy disorder include:

• Lack of interest in sexual activity or avoidance of sexual intimacy

• Anxiety, fear, or disgust related to sexual activity

• Difficulty becoming aroused or maintaining arousal during sexual activity

• Fear of abandonment from an intimate partner

• Negative attitudes or beliefs about sex or sexuality

• Relationship problems related to sexual intimacy, including difficulty communicating with partners about sexual needs or feeling disconnected from partners

• May fear being controlled by others

• Struggle with a substance use disorder

• Engage in self-sabotaging behavior when in a relationship

Childhood sexual trauma often can be a catalyst for development of an intimacy disorder. Views around sex and intimacy can become blurry and confusing. When a person has suffered from childhood sexual trauma it is common for the brain to repress the painful memories. Later in adolescence and adulthood while experimenting with sex these memories can resurface. 

Intimacy disorder can be caused by a range of factors, including hormonal imbalances, medical conditions, medication side effects, psychological issues such as depression or anxiety, or relationship problems. It's important to seek the help of a mental health professional to determine the underlying cause of the intimacy disorder and develop a treatment plan. Treatment options may include individual or couples therapy, medication, or lifestyle changes. With proper treatment and support, it is possible to improve intimacy and sexual function. Exploring the root of the intimacy disconnection will be paramount in the recovery process. Developing secure and healthy attachments in intimate relationships will allow you heal from past attachment wounds.